Batgirl and Wonder Woman: Alter Egos

by Nergd BATGIRL AND WONDER WOMAN: ALTER EGOS "So, where is Batman tonight?" asked Batgirl. "He'll be out of town for a few weeks," replied Robin, the Boy Wonder. "Then I suppose we'll have to find the Catwoman's hideout ourselves," said Batgirl. "Before she gets into any mischief." "Yeah, I suppose," agreed Robin. "Let's take the Batmobile. You can leave your Batgirlcycle in your favorite hiding spot, and we can ride together." "Do you know where the hideout is?" asked Batgirl. "Sure," replied Robin. "Catwoman left the usual obvious clues." "All right then," replied Batgirl. "I suppose it would be better if we arrived together." "And we might find the communications installed in the Batmobile useful," added Robin. "In case we need an uplink to the Batcomputer or to call for help." Robin, in a very gentlemanly way, held the door of the Batmobile open for Batgirl. "Thank you," said the cowled woman coolly as she got in. Robin was ecstatic. The teenaged crimefighter had had a crush on Batgirl ever since he had met her. He dearly wanted to get to know her better, in the most intimate way possible. But he hesitated pursuing her, for fear Batman might not approve. Or worse, that Batgirl had feelings for Batman, and not him. But, with his mentor away for a few days, Robin could find out just how far he could get with the masked crimefightress. As they drove toward the feline villainess' hideout, Robin asked Batgirl: "How do you like the Batmobile?" "I think the Batmobile is fine," replied Batgirl, again, coolly. "This is your first ride in it, isn't it?" asked Robin, rhetorically. "I made a few refinements in it recently. Would you like to see how fast it can go?" The car, thought Robin. Chicks dig the car. "No, that won't be necessary," replied Batgirl, as coldly as she could muster. "Let's just get to the hideout." Robin was unfazed by his passenger's lack of interest. He decided to try a different tactic. "I bet you'd like to see the inside of the Batcave, eh, Batgirl? How about it if I take you on a tour after we take Catwoman and her kittens to jail? Of course, I'd have to blindfold you so you wouldn't learn my true identity...," "Look! That abandoned warehouse! That looks like a likely hideout! Pull over, and we'll check it out," said Batgirl, thankful that events allowed a change of subject. Batgirl left Robin's question unanswered as the pair of crimefighters got out of the Batmobile and prepared for action. Batgirl was grateful for the diversion, as she considered Robin something of a dork, and could see where their "conversation" was going. The last thing in the world Batgirl wanted was a "date" with such a geeky teenager, even if it was to see the secrets of the Batcave. "Shall we climb the wall and enter through the skylight?" asked Robin. "I don't like the looks of this," replied Batgirl. "It smells of a trap. Tell you what: You call for some help while I reconnoiter. Take the Batmobile around the corner, so no one can see you." "But Batgirl," protested Robin. "I want to go with you." "Just do it," ordered Batgirl. "But who shall I call for help?" asked Robin. "Batman can't be reached." "Oh, I don't care," replied Batgirl, exasperatedly. "Use Batman's communicator to call someone from the Justice League." "All right," agreed Robin. "I'll try. Will you be safe?" "Never mind me," replied Batgirl. "I can take care of myself." * * * When she awoke, Batgirl found herself lying on the floor. Although her costume was intact, she was horrified to learn that her cowl had been removed, revealing her face. "Welcome to my hideout, Miss Gordon," said the unmistakable voice of the Queen of Crime: Catwoman! "How purrrrrfectly wonderful for you to drop in! So, the heroic crimefightress Batgirl is in reality Commissioner Gordon's daughter!" "How... how do you know who I am?" replied the unmasked woman, believing it was useless to deny the obvious. "Because I had a plan a while back to kidnap you," replied the felonious feline. "As Commissioner of Police, your father would have to pay a good price for such a high-profile abduction. But I discarded that plan as too risky. Now, though, Barbara Gordon has made it easy for me just by walking into the trap I had set for Batgirl. I had planned to just reveal your secret identity to the world, nullifying your effectiveness as a crimefighter, but now, I can really make that plan pay! As soon as my kittens come back, we'll start!" "You mean we're here all alone?" asked Batgirl. "That's right, Miss Gordon," replied Catwoman. "I got the 'drop' on you all by myself. But don't worry. I'm not going to hurt you. You're much more valuable to me alive." "You'll never get away with this, Catwoman!" exclaimed the exposed librarian. "Oh?" replied Catwoman. "And who's going to stop me?" "How about me?" replied a statuesque woman in a star-spangled outfit as she burst through the door of the hideout. "Wonder Woman!" gasped Catwoman. "That's right," replied the Amazon. With a quick twirl of her lasso, the busty superheroine ensnared the villainess and quickly subdued her. Wonder Woman then turned her attention to the trussed-up form of Batgirl and quickly removed her bonds. "I'm glad you're safe, Batgirl, but it looks as though your career of crimefighting is over, now that this crook has learned your secret." Batgirl was irritated at the Amazon's condescending attitude as she replied: "Thanks for coming to help, Wonder Woman, but I had everything under control." "Under control?" replied Wonder Woman. "Catwoman was about to reveal your secret identity to the world! Even if you had escaped and turned the tables on her, she would still know." "Would she?" replied Batgirl, as she put her cowl back on, and reached into a compartment in her utility belt. From it, she retrieved a capsule. "Now stand back, Wonder Woman, and hold your breath." Both women gasped and held a lungful of air as Batgirl threw the capsule at the feet of Catwoman, who was held in place by Wonder Woman's magic lasso. The capsule exploded in a cloud of white vapor. Surprised, the supervillainess gasped, and breathed in the fumes. Catwoman's eyes blinked, and then they glazed over. A moment later, she saw the two heroines and said: "Batgirl? Wonder Woman? Where... how did I... What happened?" "Never mind, kitty," replied Batgirl. "Just run along home. Remember, I'm keeping an eye on you." Catwoman quickly scurried away to join her henchmen. Batgirl turned to Wonder Woman and asked: "How did you know I was here?" "That good-looking boy, Robin, called me on the Justice League transmitter in the Batmobile," replied Wonder Woman. "I told him to wait outside. But are you going to let Catwoman get away? Aren't you even going to arrest her? She'll tell everyone who you really are! And what was that gas you sprayed on her?" "I have to let her go," replied Batgirl. "She hasn't really broken the law yet." "'Not broken the law'?" asked Wonder Woman. "How about kidnapping?" "I can't very well have her prosecuted for that," replied Batgirl. "And as for my secret identity, that chemical was a mind-altering drug that will cause Catwoman to have a permanent memory loss of the events of the past twelve hours. So you see, my secret identity is safe. But it wouldn't be if I arrested her, because then I'd have to testify, and, well, you know." "Besides," added Batgirl, "Since she has no memory of what happened, she could just deny everything, even to the point of passing a lie detector test. So it would just be her word against mine, er, ours. I doubt that even your magic lasso would get the truth from her. And if it did, well, that would be the end of my crimefighting career." "Some career," muttered Wonder Woman under her breath. "What did you say?" asked Batgirl. "I said, 'Where did you learn about that drug?'" replied Wonder Woman. "From my research at the library," replied Batgirl. "Barbara Gordon is a librarian, you know." "Hmpf! All I know is that you're involved in some dangerous business," declared Wonder Woman. "Perhaps you should settle down and find a nice young man. Maybe Robin. He's a handsome lad." "Robin?" repeated Batgirl. "Well, he may be handsome, but he's just not my type. Besides, I think he's gay. After all, a muscular teenage boy that runs around in tights and hangs around with an older man..." "In any case, Batgirl, I think it would be better for you to leave the crimefighting business to us professionals," declared Wonder Woman. "Professionals?!" shrieked Batgirl, disturbed by Wonder Woman's continuing condescension. "Look Wonder Woman, just because you've got super powers to make it easier for you to catch crooks doesn't mean that us normal mortals can't handle it!" "That's not what I meant," replied Wonder Woman. "It's just that experience is the best teacher. Besides, having super powers doesn't make it any easier, and...," "Look, Wonder Woman," interrupted Batgirl, "Anytime you want to trade places, it's fine with me." Wonder Woman paused and thought about the issue over which she was arguing with Batgirl. She then asked: "Do you really mean that?" "Mean what?" asked Batgirl in reply. "About changing places," replied Wonder Woman. "You become me, and I'll become you. Then we'll see who's the better crimefighter." "Just how would we go about doing that?" replied Batgirl incredulously. "Switch costumes? I don't think Barbara Gordon would look too good in a tiara, and besides, I'd probably miss a few bullets with those bracelets." "No," replied Wonder Woman. "That's not what I had in mind. I propose we switch our personalities between our two bodies." "You mean I would inhabit your body, and you would take over mine?" asked Batgirl. "Like on the final episode of 'Star Trek'? That's impossible!" "Oh, no it's not," countered the Amazon. "You see, I just happen to have my Purple Healing Ray in my invisible plane with me. With a few adjustments, I can use its technology to switch our bodies for a short while. But if you're afraid...," "Afraid?" replied Batgirl, who was even more irritated at Wonder Woman's suggestion of her cowardice. "Me? Lead the way!" "All right then," replied Wonder Woman as she directed Batgirl toward the invisible plane. On the way, the pair saw Robin. "Well, where's Catwoman?" He asked. "She, er, got away," replied Batgirl. "Now Robin, be a dear and wait for me. You can give me a ride back to my Batgirlcyle after Wonder Woman shows me something in her plane." "All right," agreed Robin, flushed with joy that Batgirl had referred to him as "dear". * * * Inside the invisible plane, Wonder Woman made some adjustments to her Purple Healing Ray, and soon, both heroines were strapped to the appropriate apparatus. Wonder Woman threw the switch, and a moment later, the process was complete. Wonder Woman, now in the body of Batgirl, spoke first: "How do you feel?" "I'm O.K.," replied Batgirl, now inhabiting the Amazon's voluptuous frame. "Fine," said Wonder Woman. "Now, let's brief each other on our personalities. We don't want anyone to suspect we've made a switch." After preparing each other, Wonder Woman said: "Now remember: Your secret identity is Diana Prince, and you work at Military Intelligence. You should have no trouble finding super criminals with which to do battle." "And you're Barbara Gordon," came the star-spangled woman's reply. "Librarian." "Oh, and I'll just bet those crooks are all over the library!" said Wonder Woman, sarcastically. "I can throw a Batarang at them if they talk above a whisper!" "Knock it off!" commanded Batgirl. "Now, go have Robin drive you to the Batgirlcycle. Then go to my -I mean your- apartment." "Right," agreed Wonder Woman. "And you go to mine. Are you sure you can handle flying the invisible plane?" "Of course," replied Batgirl. "All right then," said Wonder Woman. "We meet back here in twenty-four hours and see who has the better crimefighting career." "Agreed," replied Batgirl. Wonder Woman exited the plane and walked toward Robin. "Is everything O.K., Batgirl?" asked the Boy Wonder. "Yeah," replied Wonder Woman. "She just wanted to show me how we could find Catwoman again." "Oh, that's O.K.," replied Robin. "We can use the Batcomputer for that. Say... that reminds me, how about that tour of the Batcave? Would you be interested?" "Sure," replied Wonder Woman. "Why not?" * * * Batgirl landed the invisible plane where Wonder Woman had instructed. She then entered the apartment of Diana Price. Feeling somewhat spent from her experience, she decided to take a shower. Afterward, she relaxed, and lounged around the apartment. A few minutes later, the doorbell rang. Still in her bathrobe, she got up to answer it. Opening the door, she was surprised to see a man in an army colonel's uniform. She stared and her mouth opened in surprise at the sight of the man's handsome ruggedness. "Diana?" the man said. "Did you forget about my coming over tonight?" "Oh!" replied Batgirl. This must be Wonder Woman's boyfriend, Steve Trevor. The one she said was always after her to get her to marry him. Why Wonder Woman didn't do that, Batgirl couldn't imagine. But what was he doing here? Wonder Woman had told Batgirl that Steve didn't know her secret identity! "Don't you remember?" asked Steve. "You agreed that I should come over tonight, after Wonder Woman gave me the brush-off again. I thought we'd go over some of the files at work." Batgirl didn't understand why Wonder Woman hadn't ever been intimate or at least pay a little more attention to Steve. After all, he was very handsome. "Er, all right," she replied. "Let me get dressed. Come on in and have a seat." "I brought the files with me," said Steve as he entered. * * * Back at the Batcave, Wonder Woman, in the guise of Batgirl, felt Robin's hands as he removed the blindfold that prevented her from seeing the secret entrance to the Batcave. "Sorry about that, Batgirl," said Robin, "But we need to keep our identities secret from each other. I wish we didn't have to, but...," "Oh, that's all right Robin," replied Wonder Woman. "I understand." "Let me show you around," said Robin, taking Wonder Woman by the hand. The tour lasted for several hours. Wonder Woman acted impressed at every detail Robin was sharing, primarily because she found Robin's young and virile good looks so attractive. She wanted to stay near him. Robin, on the other hand, couldn't help but notice the newfound interest Batgirl was showing in him. Soon, it became apparent that he would have to make an attempt to get closer to the masked woman. "You know, Batgirl, it's getting late," said Robin. "Soon it will be light outside. I was thinking...," "Yes?" prompted Wonder Woman. "I was thinking that maybe you could, er..., spend the rest of the night here, in the Batcave," said the Boy Wonder. "I could take you back to your Batgirlcycle tomorrow night, so that you could go home under the cover of darkness." "Stay here?" replied Wonder Woman. "In the Batcave? Alone?" "No," replied Robin nervously. "I..., er..., that is..., er..., I could stay with you." There. He had said it. Wonder Woman thought about what Robin was suggesting. She could see that Robin was very interested in Batgirl, in spite of what Batgirl's feelings were. All Robin needed was a little encouragement to overpower the real Batgirl with his charms, once the two heroines switched back. If she slept with him, the Boy Wonder would no doubt become more aggressive at pursuing a more permanent relationship with Batgirl. The real Batgirl would eventually have to surrender to his attractiveness. So Wonder Woman, now completely under the spell of the young crimefighter's allure, said: "I think I'd like that." * * * Meanwhile, back at Diana Prince's apartment, Batgirl was falling victim to another man's charms. She found Wonder Woman's boyfriend so attractive that she couldn't help herself. She desperately wanted to feel his tender touch. There was nothing wrong in that, she thought. However, the way Wonder Woman acted, it was clear the Amazon only considered her relationship with Steve as platonic. But Batgirl wondered how Steve felt. So she decided to find out. "Steve?" asked Batgirl, now dressed as Diana Prince. "Yes, Diana?" replied Steve. "Why are you always chasing after Wonder Woman?" asked Batgirl. "Er..., well..., er..., the costume, I guess," replied Steve, somewhat taken aback by the question. "Wonder Woman really looks good in those blue, star-spangled briefs." "And the red and gold bustier?" added Batgirl. "And the red and gold bustier," agreed Steve. Batgirl found herself so strongly attracted to Steve's handsome ruggedness that she decided to press a bit further. "You mean to say that you'd make love to any woman who wore a Wonder Woman costume to bed?" she asked. "Oh no," nervously replied Steve. "Wonder Woman is one of a kind. I could never love anyone just because of a costume." "I have a Wonder Woman costume," said Batgirl in an obvious attempt to seduce Steve. Batgirl would have some fun while in Wonder Woman's body, after all. If she could get Steve to lie down with her, Wonder Woman would eventually have to stop being such a tease to him and submit to a more serious relationship. It wouldn't make any difference to Wonder Woman whether Steve thought he was having sex with Diana Prince or Wonder Woman, since they were the same person. And her secret identity would be safe, because Steve would just think that it was Diana to whom he had made love. It was just that Batgirl was so attracted to Steve that she just had to get him to make love to her. She thought: Robin, indeed! I'll have myself a real man, and use Wonder Woman's body to get him! "You do?" asked Steve. "Sure," replied Batgirl. "Let me go put it on and I'll show you." * * * Robin took Batgirl's hand and led her to a large bed in a corner of the Batcave. "This is where I sleep if I have to stay in the Batcave for any length of time," said Robin. "It looks very comfortable," replied Wonder Woman. "Here, let me help you," said the young masked man as he bent down and picked up the crimefightress in his arms. The cowled woman draped her arms around the boy's neck and looked longingly into his eyes. Robin carried his bundle to the bed and gently laid her down. "Er, uh..., you know, Batgirl, I've..., er..., never done this before," he admitted nervously. "That's all right," replied Wonder Woman, as she reached behind her back to unfasten the skintight Batgirl costume. "This is my first time, too." Robin was overjoyed with the idea that he was getting Batgirl's cherry! The woman he loved had not slept with anyone before. She chose him! His penis, already threatening to burst through his green shorts, grew even harder at the news. Gently, the Boy Wonder removed his cape and tunic. Wonder Woman, having removed her own cape and the upper portion of the Batgirl costume to reveal her breasts, reached up and caressed Robin's bare chest. Robin got closer, and grabbing the lower portion of Batgirl's costume, pulled the unitard over the woman's knees down to her ankles. He then pulled his own shorts off. Staring at the woman's voluptuous love mound, Robin asked: "What shall we do first?" "I don't know," replied Wonder Woman. "Like I said before. This is new to me. But you're the man. You're supposed to be dominant." Without another word, Robin grasped the nearly naked crimefightress' knees and split her legs apart. He lowered himself down, into a perfect position from which he could aim his penis into her gaping vagina. As he got closer and touched the woman's nether region with the head of his penis, the woman closed her eyes and let out a soft moan. Finding that the entrance to joy was moist, Robin continued his penetration. His excitement grew as he pumped his hips to and fro. The woman responded with a counter-tempo of gyrations, punctuated by gasps and moaning that grew louder with each thrust. Soon, Robin could feel the not-unfamiliar growth toward climax he had learned from his experiments in masturbation; Research on the very bed upon which he was now showing his mastery as a result of that fine-tuning. The couple climaxed together, and Robin exited the woman and rolled over on his back. Wonder Woman rolled over onto her side, and draped her arm around the broad shoulders of the masked teenager. She still had on her Batgirl mask, but beyond that, they were both naked in bed. Robin turned to her and kissed her. Wonder Woman kissed back. "That was wonderful, darling," said Robin. "You've made me the happiest man on earth. You know, a lot of people think Robin the Boy Wonder is gay, just because he hangs around with Batman and wears tights. But now I think we've laid that rumor to rest. Thank you." "I enjoyed it too," said Wonder Woman. "But now, I must get back. Drive me to my Batgirlcycle?" "Aw, can't I just drive you home?" pleaded the Boy Wonder. "Now that we have slept together, I think you should at least let me know who you really are under that cowl." "No, I'd better not," replied Wonder Woman as she got up from the bed and put on her Batgirl costume. * * * While Wonder Woman and Robin were entertaining each other, Batgirl returned from the bedroom and appeared in front of Steve Trevor. She placed her hands on the waist of the familiar red, blue and gold costume of Wonder Woman she had put on. "Well Steve, how do I look?" she asked, as she stood on her red-booted legs that were apart in a way that added to her provocative posture. "You look like the real Wonder Woman, Diana," replied Steve. He did not think for a moment that it in fact was the real Wonder Woman's body at which he found himself leering, but only that of his heretofore mild-mannered secretary, Diana Prince. "Do I look enough like her to make you want to lie down with me?" asked Batgirl. Taken aback, Steve said: "No, Diana, as attractive as you are in that costume, I'm afraid I'll have to decline your invitation. I must remain true to Wonder Woman." He paused a moment, looking her over, then nervously said: "Perhaps I'd better be going." Batgirl was frustrated. She thought for sure that Steve would fall victim to her appearance as Wonder Woman. She had to try a different approach, and had to do it fast before Steve left. So Batgirl came up with a new plan. "No Steve," she said. "Please don't go. I'll just have a seat over here." Not wanting to make his secretary feel embarrassed for throwing herself at his feet, Steve agreed to stay. "All right, Diana," he said. "I'll stay." "Thanks Steve," replied Batgirl. "And I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. It's just that this costume makes me feel so sexy. I can imagine why Wonder Woman likes hers so much. I hope you don't mind it if I keep it on for a little while." "Not at all," said Steve, glad that Diana would stay on display for a while. Batgirl sat in a chair directly across from Steve. Steve looked back down at the papers on which he was working. A few moments later, when he glanced back up, he saw that Diana had shifted her position in her chair so that she was lying partially on her right side. The top of her Wonder Woman costume had been pulled down so that the gold-encrusted eagle was just beneath her now-exposed breasts. With her left hand, Diana held the crotch of her star-spangled blue satin briefs out of the way as she began stroking her clitoris with her first and middle fingers. Steve was mesmerized. As he continued to stare, Batgirl changed her position so that she was now erect, but lying partially on her left leg, with her right leg crossed over to give Steve a good look at her partially uncovered vagina. Steve started breathing heavily. Batgirl's plan to make him want her seemed to be working. She proceeded to remove her Wonder Woman costume, except for her boots, bracelets, tiara, and belt. She sat with her legs far apart and once again used the fingers of her left hand to split apart her lower lips. She was staring directly at Steve with a look of desire. Then, Batgirl closed her eyes as she brought her knees together and began stroking her clitoris once again. Soon, her crotch and fingers were wet with vaginal juices. As she moaned with ecstasy, she thought, I've always wondered what Wonder Woman felt when she masturbated. Now, I know. Leaning back, Batgirl looked at Steve. She noticed a bulge in his pants that was quickly growing larger. She could tell that he was about to lose his self-control, but needed a little more coaxing. So she removed her belt and leaned back, careful to show her naked breasts and her crotch. Finally, she laid on the floor, and crossing her wrists and placing her hands just above her crotch, partially obscuring it, she said: "Take me, Steve. Take me now." Steve Trevor immediately leapt to his feet and in one swift motion pulled his trousers and shorts to his ankles. He fell onto the woman, and their stomachs slapped as Steve pushed his penis all the way in. Taken somewhat by surprise, Batgirl could only wheeze at Steve's entrance into her. She gyrated her hips in an effort to add to the sensation, but all too soon, it was over. Steve had been ready to cum almost as soon as he saw her enter the room in her Wonder Woman costume. Extracting himself from the vagina he thought belonged to his secretary, Steve said: "I know that was quick, Diana, but the fun is just beginning. Open your mouth." Batgirl could not understand what had happened. It was her idea to seduce Steve into thinking he was having sex with his beloved Wonder Woman. But now, Steve had clearly gained control of the situation. She opened her mouth in anticipation. "That's it Diana," said Steve as he placed his penis inside the willing woman's mouth. Batgirl was amazed at how quickly the man's member had hardened after having just been used. She licked for all she was worth, and when he came again, Batgirl quickly swallowed every drop. * * * As Wonder Woman was fastening the Batgirl costume's utility belt, Robin, now dressed, grabbed her shoulders and said: "One last kiss." Wonder Woman reached up to embrace the Boy Wonder and return the kiss, but in so doing, she let go of the utility belt. It clattered on the floor of the Batcave and loosened one of the tablets Batgirl had used to erase the memory of Catwoman the night before. Instantly, the gas enveloped the two lovers, who barely had time to unlock their lips from each other. A few moments later, the couple regained their senses. "Robin?" asked Wonder Woman. "How...? Where...? Is this the Batcave? How did I get here? Robin?" "Batgirl?" replied the Boy Wonder. "What are you doing here? Are you all right?" "I'm fine, I think," replied Wonder Woman. "But why did you call me 'Batgirl'? I'm Wonder Woman!" "Wonder Woman?" replied Robin. "No, you're not. Look!" Wonder Woman looked in a mirror. "Something's very wrong here," she said. "Why do I look like Batgirl? I am Wonder Woman!" "Wait here," said Robin. "I'll call Wonder Woman on the Justice League transmitter. She'll straighten this out!" "But I'm Wonder Woman!" protested Wonder Woman, as Robin attached a blindfold to her eyes and proceeded to the rendezvous point where Wonder Woman had earlier appeared. * * * While Batgirl was still lying on the floor in delight, Steve got up and refastened his pants. "Thank you, Diana," he said. "For a wonderful evening. I guess you were right. It's the costume that makes a woman a wonder." "Glad to be of help, Steve," said Batgirl. "How about some breakfast?" asked Steve. "Sure," replied Batgirl. "Just let me put some clothes on." "No need to on my account," said Steve with a crooked grin. "Oh?" replied Batgirl. "I should go to the restaurant naked? You are a rascal, Steve Trevor!" Just then, the phone rang. It was a special tone that Wonder Woman had told Batgirl meant that the Justice League communicator was being used to make contact. "I'll get it!" cried Batgirl. On the other end of the line was Robin. Batgirl listened, then said: "I'll be right there!" and hung up. She turned to Steve and said: "Sorry Steve, but I'll have to take a rain check on that breakfast. Maybe we'll do it again sometime." "'Maybe we'll do it again sometime'?" repeated Steve with incredulity. "Look, Diana, we just had the most fantastic lovemaking session in the history of men and women. Your body was made for sex! And now you want to give me the brush-off because of a lousy phone call? Who was that, anyway? Another lover?" "So my body was 'made for sex'?" replied Batgirl, aghast at the thought of Robin, the Boy Wonder, being mistaken for a lover. "Is that all I am to you? A body for sex? Well, Steve Trevor, perhaps you'd better go! Maybe you can find someone else with a Wonder Woman costume to wear for you! Or, better yet, get one to wear yourself while you masturbate!" She added as she slammed the door. I guess that Steve Trevor isn't such a great catch after all, she thought. Wonder Woman can have him! * * * After the two heroines returned to normal, Wonder Woman asked Batgirl: "Well, how did it go? I mean, having super powers isn't all it's cracked up to be, is it?" "I guess not," agreed Batgirl. "And I'm sorry about you losing your memory and all that. I should have been more careful storing those capsules in my utility belt. By the way, why was it loose? Were you taking it off or something?" "I don't remember," replied Wonder Woman. "Maybe I had to go to the bathroom." "Yeah, that must be it," agreed Batgirl. "I can tell because my stomach doesn't feel so good." "Neither does mine," said Wonder Woman. "And I have this funny taste in my mouth." "So, what did you do during your one day as Wonder Woman?" asked Wonder Woman. "I spent it as Diana Prince," said Batgirl. "You see, Steve Trevor came over to your apartment and...," "Oh!" exclaimed Wonder Woman. "That's right! We needed to review some files. I forgot to tell you. I guess you had a pretty boring night after all. I'll bet you'll be glad to get back into action as Batgirl." "Not until Barbara Gordon's had something to eat first," replied Batgirl. "Oh! Look at the time!" exclaimed Wonder Woman. "I'll have to get back to the office before I'm missed. I'd love to stay and chat, but I've got to get going. Perhaps we'll try it again sometime?" "Not on your life!" replied Batgirl. "I'll stay being Batgirl, and you stay being Wonder Woman!" * * * When Barbara Gordon finally got home, she was famished. She went to her refrigerator, opened the door, and said to herself: "Let's see. Pickles and strawberry ice cream. That should do the trick!" Then, she thought to herself: "Pickles and ice cream?! Why do I crave pickles and ice cream?! Oh, no! It couldn't be!" * * * When Diana Prince showed up at work, she couldn't understand why Steve Trevor was giving her the cold shoulder. Sure, she was a few hours late that day, but she had been late before. Then, at the end of the day, she was called into Steve's office. Maybe now I'll get an explanation, she thought. Instead, she received a severe tongue-lashing from Steve, during which he criticized her performance, muttering something about what had happened the night before, and earlier that day. Perhaps Batgirl had pissed Steve off somehow. At the end of the tirade, Steve handed Diana a pink slip, and told her her services were no longer required. Diana was stunned. She had been fired! She quickly left the office, not bothering to clean her desk. She went home determined to find out what had happened. She would find Batgirl and go over every detail of the night before. Diana Prince changed into Wonder Woman and took to the skies in her invisible plane. She was flying toward Barbara Gordon's apartment when she spied a bank robbery in progress. Quickly, she swooped down, landed her plane, and entered the bank. She said to the robbers: "Mind if I join the party, boys?" One of the bank robbers turned around and cried: "Wonder Woman! Get her, boys!" One of the robbers lunged at the superheroine. Wonder Woman tried to step aside, but was hit directly in her midsection. With a "Whoof!" she fell over. The robber fell atop her and raised his fist to strike another blow. Surprised at her miscalculation, Wonder Woman strained her muscles to throw off her attacker, but found that her super strength was gone! The crook then landed a blow to her temple, knocking the superheroine unconscious. Fortunately for Wonder Woman, sirens from the approaching police forces frightened away the robbers, who made a clean getaway. Moments later, the police arrived. Shortly thereafter, Batgirl appeared, then Robin. Batgirl couldn't understand why Robin was staring, almost leering at her. The two masked crimefighters approached Wonder Woman, who was just then regaining consciousness. "What happened?" asked Batgirl of the fallen superheroine. "Batgirl!" exclaimed the injured Amazon. "I don't know. But somehow, I lost my super powers. I can only think that it must have been related to our switch." "I've been feeling strange, too," replied Batgirl. "Maybe we'd better check the equipment in your plane." * * * "Everything checks out," Wonder Woman said to Batgirl. "I don't know how I could have lost my super powers unless... Wait a minute! Batgirl! Just EXACTLY what did you and Steve do last night?" Batgirl told the story. "You did WHAT?!" exclaimed Wonder Woman. "Oh no! I'm ruined!" "What's wrong, Wonder Woman?" asked Batgirl. "I thought you and Steve were, well, you know..." "No, Steve and I are NOT 'you know'!" cried Wonder Woman. "We couldn't be! It is an Amazon curse: If I have sex with a man, I lose my super powers! Permanently!" "Well, you were the one who said super powers didn't matter, so I guess that's one on you!" said Batgirl. "You little snit!" cried Wonder Woman. "I'll..." Wonder Woman reached for Batgirl. But before the larger woman could land the intended blow, Batgirl gave her a chop in the back of the neck that sent the despoiled ex-superheroine reeling. * * * The next day, Barbara Gordon got her worst fears confirmed. "Are you sure doctor?" she asked. "Congratulations!" replied the doctor. "Now, for the record, what is the father's name?" "Er..., I don't know," replied Barbara. "In that case, Miss Gordon," said the doctor as he cleared his throat, "May I recommend some counseling?" "No thank you, doctor," said Barbara. "I want to keep the baby." * * * A few months later, when she began to "show", Barbara Gordon was disowned by her strait-laced father and forced to quit her job at the library. She entered the Wayne Foundation's Home for Unwed Mothers. She had given up her activities as Batgirl immediately after learning of her condition, for fear that her vigorous physical activities might harm her baby. She had attempted to contact Diana Prince to find out who the father was, but Miss Prince was nowhere to be found. Due to the memory-erasing gas, Wonder Woman could not recall the details of that night, so she would have been of little use anyway. Barbara considered that it might have been one of the Catwoman's henchmen. But since the Catwoman had not harassed her since their earlier encounter, Barbara believed that her Batgirl identity was still unknown to the villainess. So, Barbara concluded that Catwoman was not responsible. Meanwhile, Diana Prince had not gotten pregnant with Steve Trevor's child, and thus had no grounds for a paternity suit. (Her sexual harassment case was thrown out, since she could not relate her experiences, owing to her loss of memory.) So she found a new job as a waitress at a truckstop outside of town. She had tried to return to her role as Princess of Paradise Island, but when her sister Amazons learned of her despoliation, she was defrocked, stripped of her costume and accessories, and banished. To supplement her income, she wears a replica of her Wonder Woman apparel she bought at a Halloween costume store, much to the satisfaction of her clients. The Catwoman also retired due to pregnancy, as, using the Batcomputer, Robin found her. Robin's newfound confidence had the effect of bringing Catwoman under his charms, and soon the pair had had intimate relations. Catwoman, too, had been infatuated with the young teenager's bulge in his tights. Robin never saw Batgirl again, Batgirl never saw Steve Trevor again, and Wonder Woman never saw Robin again. nospam